My father followed me sa twitter. Fuck.
You know those times when you just got your heart broken, and you’re thinking, “I should’ve known, I really should’ve known”? Well, I say, yes, you really should have, but there’s nothing you can do about it now, except take a little time off wallowing and then get your ass off that couch and your guard back up. So I’ve decided to help by preparing a list of situations in which falling in love would only result in heartbreak, to help you avoid repeating the same mistake.
1. Don’t fall in love in a relationship that started off with lust
This is the kind of love story that has graced both the big screen and the small screen many, many times and it had fooled a great many of us into thinking that we, too, could fall in love with a one-night stand. But it’s different here in the…
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This feeling of uncertainty unnerves me. It’s almost as bad as the crushing feeling of unrequited love. Maybe even worse.
There’s the confusion, when you’re unsure about your feelings for the person, if it’s just platonic love or beyond that. (I am hating myself for the incorrect use of punctuation marks.) Then there’s this silent desperation to figure out what the hell your mind’s thinking because you don’t fucking know what’s going on, and to know if maybe (just maybe), that person feels the same way about you. There is nothing quite like the feeling of unrequited emotion; the non-reciprocation of what you’ve given to a person, awareness irrelevant. Then there’s the anger: -directed towards the self, because why oh why did you fall? How could you have been such a fool? Masochistic unintelligent girl, why did you love an imperfect being? To get yourself hurt? To feel? -directed towards others, comprising the object of affection, the people around, people in general, and the relative surroundings, because they all comprised to make you fall.
Ate Loiz is here, and I forgot what I was going to say next, and I hope this frame of mind doesn’t continue (I hope my mind gets back soon) because I’m failing my classes and I really don’t want to do that.
I hate you. I love you. I like you. I miss you. I don’t know what I feel about you.
I WAS SO NUMB AND COLD DURING THE FLIGHT AND IT WAS STILL EARLY MORN WHO WAKES UP AT THAT GOD-FORSAKEN HOUR???
I HAVEN’T SLEPT YET.
MY TEETH WERE CHATTERING LIKE CRAZY.
MY TEETH HURT BECAUSE OF THE ELASTICS.
I DON’T GET A THING ABOUT OUR CHEM REPORTS. I FEEL SO CHEM-DUMB, AND TO THINK IT WAS ONE OF MY OKAY SUBJECTS IN HIGH SCHOOL.
THE AIRPORT YELLOW TAXI DRIVER WAS A DOUCHE.
I COULDN’T PEE BECAUSE THE CAT WAS INSIDE. AGAIN.
I REFUSED TO GET OUT OF BED. MY TIME WAS WASTED BECAUSE I DIDN’T EVEN GET EFFECTIVE SLEEP.
I COULDN’T BREATHE THIS ROOM WAS AND STILL IS SUFFOCATING ME. FRESH AIR CAN’T GET INSIDE.
KFC PULLED OUT ITS PROMO ALREADY.
I STILL HAVE TONS OF THINGS TO DO, AND TOO LITTLE TIME.
MAY PAGSAMA PA BUKAS.
I HAVE TO PAY GIANNE, OICO, CHLOE, AND CHIARA. MY DEBT IS ENORMOUS.
THE KUYA WHO GOT MY PAYMENT FOR THE BOARDING HOUSE DID NOT GIVE ME A RECEIPT.
THIS IS A SUCKY DAY.
I AM NOT A FEELINGS DUMP!!!
I AM NOT YOUR PSYCHIATRIST (YOU DON’T EVEN PAY ME!).
You have seen how fragile and ugly I am as a human being, so why don’t you get it? I am giving out a lot of hints, but you ignore them. I don’t like talking about Gan and your feelings, okay?!! It just makes me hate you both more. And I’m trying to be a better person, so YOU ARE NOT HELPING. Can’t you talk about other stuff? I know you can, so why pick this path when you talk to me? I hate my role in your life. I hate you.
If I could just disappear, I would.